Fight or Flight? Dealing with a Difficult Colleague!

Have you had or are in a situation where your colleague is making your life miserable? I have been in these types of jobs a few times in the past and let me tell you, it’s no laughing matter.

 

A reader recently asked me this question:

 

Saw your web page and felt that I want your take on my situation.

First of all I've worked for an organization as an admin asst for years and during this time I have seen many co-workers leave and have had to put up with a lot.  Currently there is a clerical staff person, sitting in a cubicle right across from me who has made my daily work experience miserable.  She has been here a little over 1 1/2 years and has recently been promoted to an Administrative Assistant.

 

This is a typical work day for her:

• She comes in late EVERYDAY (not just a few minutes, but 15-25 minutes with an excuse for WHY she's late - traffic - and she lives 10 minutes away).
• Then she spends at least the first hour discussing what she did the day before at home; cooking, cleaning, shopping, gossiping, what ever she did after she left work.
• Next she starts complaining about people around her, her friends, her spouse’s friends, kids, etc.
• Now it's time to begin the process of gossiping about co-workers, belittling co-workers, making snide comments about other staff.
• Then it's time to leave for lunch - a one hour lunch usually turns in to an hour and 15-20 minute lunch (usually with another person).
• Now that she's back from lunch then it's time to complain about the co-worker she had lunch with that day.
• As the clock ticks away, getting closer to quitting time, she decides to get busy and then claims overtime (when she mostly stands around and gossip after quitting time).

She is also the type of person who is "over friendly" face to face, but does not hesitate to tear that person apart once they have left the area.

 

I had voiced my concerns and complaints about her to HR, my supervisor, etc, and was told that there is nothing they can do about her. So I've had to bite my tongue, try to "tune" her out and do my job.

 

Really she makes my work day miserable and yet is rewarded for her bad behaviour, chronic tardiness and gossiping.  It amazes me why some people get away with this behaviour and others are penalized for it.

 

My response to this was:

 

Wow!  This really sounds like the type of colleague you don't want to have.  Well, here's my take on it:

1. Have you tried to talk to her directly about what has been going on?  This sometimes helps the situation, since they might not be aware of it (believe it or not).
2. You mentioned that you've spoken to your supervisor, HR, etc.  Did you take it up each level all the way to the top?
3. If all else fails, you might want to start considering what type of work environment you are in.  If the management at your organization doesn't care about what's going on, is this really a place that you want to be at? 

You can also check out an article I wrote on "4 Ways to Cope with Difficult Colleagues"

 

I hope that I've at least shed some light on your situation and hope that things can get resolved one way or another.  Don't drive yourself nuts about these things.  Life's too short to stress out!

 

If you have any other suggestions, please feel free to comment!

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Until next time,

Take care - of your clutter!


Post from: Administrative Assistant